HELP I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP

It's been a while since I wrote about anything non-medical, so I have a quickly, but insanely, embarrassing story for you in the realm of...yes...this could really only happen to me. Here goes...

Last night I went with my friends to the switch weekend party. Switch weekend is Friday-Sunday when the third years, no matter what rotation they are on, "switch", and so they are off for the weekend. Because of this, and the fact that they really usually are working on the other weekends, there is always some sort of function for them to have fun (and they invite the rest of the school to join). At the beginning this party was insanely lame (circa 8:45 pm)....we are talking like 5 people, 3 of which were me and my friends, but over the course of 2 hours, it grew to about 60 or so. At one point my friend wanted to hear "Call Me Maybe" (which I am slightly embarrassed to admit has become our new dance obsession) and the bartender didn't have it but said she could plug in my phone. My friend was like "GIMME"...so I did...but then I nervously like waited around to get my phone back before "random" on my phone turned into country music, glee, broadway....or worse...some sort of USMLE review thing that no one else needs to know I listen to...blasting at the bar (I can see it now: "WHO DOWNLOADED USMLE SONGS TO LEARN THE MATERIAL. SO WEIRD.") Anyway, we were having a good time catching up...especially since I haven't been out much as I've been sick with migraines...and I wasn't drinking because of the migraine meds and all that, but I took a brief bathroom break...and that is where it all went down.

The bathroom was one of those unisex m/f one stall rooms. It was located in the center of the back of the little private area of where we were all hanging out. After I...went to the bathroom...I fiddled with the flush and realized it wasn't flushing. I pressed down on it like 4/5 times...then tried pressing up...then I got super pissed off. I then looked to the right of me and saw a chain...and I thought..."OH, this must be one of those bathrooms that flushes by chain"...and I pulled it...no questions asked. Still, nothing happened on the toilet flushing end...so I just washed my hands and merrily walked out to continue my conversation with my friends.

Upon exit, EVERYONE in the private room was staring at me (it felt like I had just forgotten to pull my pants up and I walked out of their naked our something...that much staring). There was an alarm sounding and a flashing light (like a fire alarm) vibrating and going off above my head. Some people were confused as to whether they were supposed to evacuate, and I was mainly confused as to what the hell was going on...as it looked to be coming from my direction. My friend came over and she said to me.."did you do that"....and my response was..."one second"(with the little whisper and casual show of the number one). With that, I shuffled back in and pulled the chain the other way...and off went the alarm, the lights, everything. Even though it went off quickly, all I could think off was...HOLY SHIT. I SET OFF THE ALARM. IN THE BAR. The embarrassment damage was beyond DONE. I was BRIGHT RED and hilariously cracking up. I seriously only wanted to flush the toilet and didn't even take the time to read the sign that said "only pull in emergencies" (better yet, why did no one come help me? but...thats a story for an expose, or something). I guess it's good to know my life is still random...even sober, stupidly, publicly, and when I least expect it.

Cross that off my bucket list.