Is there such a thing as...Calf Fat?

All I wanted was a new pair of boots to wear to work in the winter. Even if I could honestly care less what I wear to work to sit on the computer in my office, I kept thinking to myself that Uggs are not professional. Sure, they are like fluffy pillows for my feet...but "work attire" probably not.

So I decided to check out the online shopping sales that kept bombarding my inbox due to my BCBG, Jcrew, and Lord and Taylor mailing lists. Now, those of you who know me well, know that I do not shop often, but when I do, I tend to get everything all at once. Example: I went into BCBG last April for a formal dress and got a salesperson to basically become my personal shopper while she talked me into getting new shoes, accessories, and dresses for my sister's wedding and graduation. True, I needed to get all of these things at SOME point, but I have realized that I just sort of SAMS club shop...and buy in bulk. I am like a salesperson working on commission's dream come true.

But I digress, on BCBG's site I found the boots I wanted...over half off, flats (yes, I am just over 5 ft 1 and look for shoes that are FLATS), and definitely the kind of shoes people would think I knew fashion if I wore. Even though I don't really follow fashion much, it is definitely a plus if I look like I know what I am doing. I am ALWAYS a size 7 in shoes, clothing is a whole different issue, but shoes...I am a 7. So I order these boots:



A few days later, the boots arrive and I am SO excited to not have to be wearing Uggs to work anymore. I put them on and they fit my feet...good sign...but as I start zipping them up in the back (there is a back zipper and it goes to basically the knee)...I can get to my calf and that's it. To zip the shoe ANYMORE I would have to pinch my leg, or somehow find a way to "suck in my calf muscle". So after calling BCBG and finding out I could NOT return my sale item, which is still VERY expensive to just have sitting in your closet and not be able to wear, I spend the next 30 minutes to an hour looking at my calves and trying to decide if by losing weight(which I am trying to do), my calves could decrease in size. Is there such thing as calf fat??

Even if by goggling Calf fat I came up with web sites about how to lose this weight and special exercises to do so, I remain unconvinced that my calves will in fact shrink by exercising. If anything I am afraid running will only make them bigger.

Therefore, my next mission is to find a cobbler and see if they can stretch the leather to fit my legs. The only question I have is...do cobblers still exist? Shakespeare had them, and I can definitely picture old city Philly having them back in the day, but nowadays how often do people need to go to a cobbler. Did they get absorbed into tailors or dry cleaners? If I do find a cobbler, I only hope that he looks like this and I can feel like I am in frontier land in Disney world singing Zip-a-dee-doo-dah while I get my shoes fixed:



Oh online shopping...how you seemed so easy, but now made my life THAT much more complicated.

By the way, does anyone else think it is weird that Calf is spelled exactly like the baby cow??!! I definitely spent time checking this and asking around as I did not really believe it, but at least now I have a fat animal to blame for my boots not fitting.